Lots of things swimming around my head that I might write about.
The cool thing about this new format is that I don’t need to think about which of those make sense, which of them I even have the words to articulate yet.
For an overthinker like me, not having to think at all is hella refreshing.
It’s important that I remember to write for no-one (or for myself). I can decide what to share or not share later. As soon as I factor in the people who might read it, my mind starts to censor or edit in real time.
This is such a cool exercise in doing something without caring what other people think.
It’s something I realised over the last few years… so much of what I was doing was being decided around how it might be perceived by others.
My first realisation of this was in 2021. I was in my condo by myself, and realised that I was choosing what music to listen to based on whether my brother and friends circa 2004 would think it was cool.
And then I started to notice it with other things too. Stating my opinions about movies or restaurants based on those voices from almost 20 years ago and what they’d say about it. Choosing what to wear based on who I might see that day and how they might judge me.
Absolutely not serving me. But like with most things, awareness is 80% of the solution. Once I was able to realise that that’s what I was doing on autopilot, it wasn’t too difficult to consciously change it.
I’m still doing it now. As I type I’m having thoughts about who might read this and what they might say. But I’ve got better at noticing that that’s happening, and choosing to type anyway.
I don’t know where these daily journals will end up. That’s the fun of it. I’m just brain dumping. Will I start to extract standalone topics from here? Will I start sharing these as-is? At some point sharing has got to be involved in the equation. I feel strongly that the purpose of writing these won’t always be just for my own personal growth. I just need to figure out how to do that without losing the rawness.
If (and to me it seems like a big ‘if’ right now) there are people in the world who want to read these raw, and share in return whatever ideas are triggered in them when they read my ideas, incredible things will happen. Thinking works better as a group activity.
It could be cool to set it up so that people can highlight a phrase that resonates with them in some way and type a note of what it triggered in them and I can see that and we can watch these idea seedlings flourish and grow exponentially 🤔 I don’t know how that’s compatible with if I’m putting these in emails though. Something to think more about.
Anything else that needs to emerge onto this paper before I go and make breakfast?………
Depends how deep/broad I want to go. I have thoughts about aftersun and how liberally to use chemicals on our bodies and how we feel about people giving us chemicals without our consent. And how that relates to the foods we eat nowadays. And thoughts about fan motors. And about computer security. And about death and grief. And about (not) drinking alcohol. And about relationships and communication. I’m content that those aren’t for me to type out right now. Peace out ✌️
